These high-flying flags are not a welcome sign
This article originally appeared on tcpalm.com. You can read the original article here.
The white flags billowing in the cool breeze Tuesday morning looked magnificent.
What they represent is anything but beautiful.
The 198 flags flying outside the CASTLE headquarters on Midway Road symbolize the number of children throughout Florida who died in 2008 as a result of child abuse. Seven of those kids were from the Treasure Coast, all but two of them from St. Lucie County.
Walking through the ranks of the flags and seeing the name tags was a moving experience: Booker, 8 years; Emanuel, 5 months; Joncarlos, 17 months; Cameron, 4 months; Shantavia, 2 months.
Most never made the news, lives that were snuffed out far too soon for reasons unknown.
One name hit me like a bolt of electricity.
Tristan Allegra, 8, of Port St. Lucie died Christmas Eve 2008 after his mother, Eryn, distraught over a failed marriage, financial problems and the loss of string of jobs, gave him eight Advil pills, smothered him as he slept, and then tried to commit suicide herself.
Tristan’s father and grandmother brought a white Teddy bear and laid flowers at the base of his flag.
I was at CASTLE to see the flags return home after a five-week tour of the Treasure Coast. Thousands of people saw them flying in Vero Beach, Stuart, Port St. Lucie or Okeechobee, yet I’m sure most failed to realize their tragic significance.
Tuesday’s dedication ceremony wasn’t all about tragedy, however.
Beverly Smith, a single mom from Okeechobee, told the crowd her story of hope.
Smith said that when she heard about CASTLE’s Strengthening Families program, she was at the end of her rope. Going through a separation from her husband of 18 years, she had five resentful and rebellious teenagers who didn’t necessarily want to be with her.
Fourteen weeks later, Smith and the children graduated from the program. Not only had they received counseling and advice, they’d been able to share their experiences with other families going through the same hell.
Smith said before CASTLE she’d been “exhausted in every possible way: financially, physically, mentally, spiritually and just plain tired.”
She was looking for a rest stop, a place “with a little nutrition, maybe some first aid and a little encouragement to go back out and keep pressing on.”
Today, Smith said the family is doing much better. Her divorce is final and she’s able to get on with her life. She credits the CASTLE program with helping her and the kids make it. There’s no fairy-tale ending, she stressed, but things are much better.
What she didn’t say spoke volumes: There are no flags for any of her children.
CASTLE Executive Director Theresa Garbarino-May recalled that when they began the flag ceremony five years ago, there were 94 flags. So this year’s total is “going in the wrong direction,” she agreed.
In five years, a total of 760 children in Florida have lost their lives to abuse. There are many more abuse cases that don’t result in death; the Department of Children & Families cited 110,000 last year.
CASTLE’s programs obviously are making a difference in many lives, yet there’s a crying need to increase awareness of child abuse.
April has been designated Child Abuse Prevention Month in Port St. Lucie, Vero Beach and Stuart so far.
It’s a small start, but it is a start. We all need to work harder to make sure there are fewer flags flying next year.
Anthony Westbury is a columnist for Scripps Treasure Coast Newspapers. This column reflects his opinion. For more on St. Lucie County topics, follow his blog at TCPalm.com/westbury. Contact him at (772) 409-1320 or anthony.westbury@scripps.com.